to 9 were taken at Michaelaīs birthday in 2000
Photo 10 was taken on christmas, 2000
Photos 11 to 14 were taken at Michaelaīs
birthday in 2001
Photos 15 and 16 were taken on christmas, 2003
Dear beloved friends of Michaela,
as probably most of you heard it, my
Michaela took her life on monday, 28th of June, 2004.
I was the last one who saw her only
by a fluke, I had an appointment at the dentists and wanted to leave the
opening the front door. Michaela was standing in front of me carrying a box
in her arms. She was suprised to see me and
asked if I had a key for the cellarīs door. She thought she had one, but her
one was wrong. We went down and I saw another
box right standing in front of the cellarīs door. I wondered what is in
there and asked her why she brought these things. She
evaded the question, placed the boxes in the cellar and closed the door
I asked if something was wrong, I
saw it in her face. She told me that everything was right. We went upstairs
and I had to go
because of the appointment, at the frontdoor I asked her if we would see
each other later when I be back. She affirmed if I
would not leave for hours. She showed me that she wanted to go upstairs to
the parents room and smiled a little, so I left.
I thought everything is right.
Later when I returned I went to my
parents cause I wanted to meet Michaela. I saw my mother and asked her if
still there. She told me that Michaela hasnīt been there and I told her that
she placed some boxes in the cellar. My father
went down and came back with a letter, her last letter. Immediately I called the
police and let her car for trace.
My father and me took the car and
we went to her place of residence. The ceiling was covered with dark clouds
there. I had
a bad clue. We went to the house were she lived with her partner we informed
on the ride. He was innocent and totally drained.
Michaela wasnīt there, but the house was tidied up as to show she had
cleaned up with her life.
We called friends, but nobody had a
hunch where she could be. We had no chance to do something, I visited some
liked, but with no success.
The next day I heard she committed
suicide. I was finished. I went to the place where she did it, not far from her house away.
I had to see the
place. Iīm sure it helped me a bit, the sun was shining that day showing me
Michaela is free of all worries she
must have had
for a very long time.
Later we found out that she sold
most of her solids she liked so much, other facts let us assume that she
planned her leave for
a very long time. Michaela was a person who was something like closed.
Neither her partner, nor me or my parents really know
the reason why she did it. She rarely talked about her worries, but of late
we found that contact came short more and more.
didnīt recognize that really. Everthing seemed to be quite normal.
Now I have to realize that you
really miss someone when he is gone, when itīs to late...
Dear little sister,
when I saw you last monday, I felt something was
when I asked you what matters, you kept your problems alone
you tricked me so calm with your last smile
so I left you in thought that everything is fine
later I felt for matter, knowing why you were there
I found that last letter, sealed as you were before
I cried out for help, trying to stop your awful plan
I went to the place I supposed where you are
dark clouds covered the sky, seemed like heaven wanted to cry
I could not find you, but if so, nothing had changed
next day sun shined with bright glare
so heaven showed me you were in care
dear sister, your loss hurts me so hard
but sometimes it helps
to know all of your burden has gone from this time
your little brother